Infinite Menus, Copyright 2006, OpenCube Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Cyclops: Early best and worst nominees
Mar 14, 2014 | 1977 views | 0 0 comments | 29 29 recommendations | email to a friend | print
Bryan Gray
Bryan Gray

The views expressed in this column are those of the author and not necessarily of the Davis Clipper. 

  While 2014 is not even a quarter over, Cyclops is already viewing worthy nominations for this column’s Dumb Quotes/Best and Worst of the Year award.  How about these for starters:

MOST DISTRUBING QUOTE FROM A SUSPECTED CHILD ABUSERS:  A Davis County man admitted to police that he behaved inappropriately with a five-year old girl.  His reason: The girl “was not getting love at home, so I gave it to her” and since the man was not receiving love from his wife, so he “decided to get love and share love” with the child.  The 54-year old man also told police “the Bible does not set limits on the age between two partners.”

WORST POSITION IN PRO SPORTS: Utah Jazz coach Ty Corbin can’t win.  If the Jazz lose, he is criticized for the team’s poor record.  If the Jazz win, he is criticized for falling back in the race for the NBA’s top draft picks.

MOST STUPID POLITICAL STUNT:  While signaling that she wants to replace Gov. Gary Herbert in the next gubernatorial election, Utah House Speaker Becky Lockhart sternly criticized Herbert for not opposing an expansion of Medicaid.  Not surprisingly, Gov. Herbert threatened to veto Lockhart’s pet project of rob transportation funds to buy $300 million worth of iPads and other high-tech devices for school children.  Sorry, Speaker Lockhart, but you don’t poke the bear in the eye and then ask for its cooperation.

BEST POLITICAL MOVE:  Not only did Gov. Herbert return Lockhart’s serve, he also sounded presidential when he hinted he would veto an early legislative plan to squash the Count My Vote petition drive.  “The Legislature shouldn’t silence the people’s voice,” he said. If he keeps this up, the Democrats would be silly thinking any of their candidates could beat him in the next election. He’s a shoo-in!

BEST EXAMPLE OF HARMING ECONOMIC DEVELOPMENT:  The Utah Senate is refusing to remove the silly Zion Curtain which supposedly protects a child’s virtue by ensuring he or she won’t see a glass of wine being poured or a margarita blended.  A handful of cities have actually offered to donate late free of charge to major restaurant chains, but the companies have turned them down due to the Zion Curtain provision.  The Zion Curtain does nothing to stop impaired driving and continues to stop job creation and make Utahns look like foolish puritans.

BEST EXAMPLE OF COMPROMISE:  A juvenile court judge has refused to separate a six-year old girl form her Utah adoptive parents Р the only parents she has known Р but has agreed to give ample visitation rights to her birth father who was shut out of the adoption process.  The judge decided taking the girl away from her family would disrupt the girl’s life and lead to life-long psychological harm, but also agreed the birth father should share joint decision making with the couple.

WORST QUOTE AIMED AT IMPROVING UTAH’S IMAGE:  A Richfield man defended crowds at violent cockfighting events, saying “It’s kind of a family reunion.”  (Gov. Herbert will get extra points for not putting this guy on the Utah Tourism Board!)

We still have more than nine months to go, but these 2014 nominations look strong.

Comments-icon Post a Comment
No Comments Yet
Postings are not edited and are the responsibility of the author. You agree not to post comments that are abusive, threatening or obscene. Postings may be removed at the discretion of
Follow us on: